The Magnet Is On High:
Single Life
My girlfriend and I have a saying – “The Magnet Is On!” And some weeks, it is on high. Of course other weeks it seems to be cloaked (if I want to take credit for my dry run) or it’s just FLIPPING OFF!
Having a magnet, and just getting use to its full and awesome powers, can lead to some interesting weeks. Take a week one spring, when I had just discovered this, what some might call, Law of Attraction concept. While I was complaining to my girlfriends about the lack of actual sex in my life my magnet got a little confused and I ended up with the following results:
Sunday – one line message from a friend proclaiming his safe sex capabilities
Wednesday – letter, from someone I didn’t even realize was interested in me – explaining a previous awkward situation. The letter went on to tell me he was recently (as in the past 6 months) married, but in a loveless marriage, and so would I give him a call?
Friday – a friend of mine, who I had not spoken to in over a year calls from Europe and asks if I want to go on a cruise. At first, I am naive enough to think that he is bored and looking for a SCUBA buddy for a cruise. However, when he says, “I can’t believe you are even really thinking about it” And I say, “separate rooms of course” His emphatic “Noooooooooooo” gives the game away. Of course, no cruise plans were made.
Result of various wacky magnet weeks:
On the plus side, I now know I could get laid on 3 Continents with a simple phone call.
However I also have NO male friends to go out with, because during a month or two in the spring , as I was learning to use The Magnet’s awesome power, I somehow encouraged ALL and I do mean EVERY, SINGLE ONE of my male friends to state that their intentions were something other than platonic.
Hence – the eternal question from When Harry Met Sally is finally answered. Can a man truly be in a platonic relationship with a woman, or is he always in the back of his head wanting more?
Answer – in his mind a man is never in a strictly platonic relationship with a woman, unless he’s gay.
If you thought that was funny, you might like He’s How Old?
