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My Devina

Biracial Dating

Biracial Dating

So I’m dating someone who is black. And honestly, this does not bother me.  Nor does it bother any of my friends.

And just to be clear, it’s not like this is the first black guy I’ve dated.  But it is the first black guy I began talking to about the possibility of having kids with in a real way. Granted, the conversation was maybe a little ahead of itself, on some levels.  But this led to him asking me if my family would have a problem with me having a life partner who was black.

The sad thing is – the answer is yes – some of my family would have an issue.  It sucks that in this day and age, that this question should even need to be broached.  In this amazing melting pot that is the US, how can this question still be circulating?  And asked to a third generation American, who’s first generation Italian grandfather was deemed a “whop” and unworthy of marrying my Scotch-Irish grandmother.  (Luckily for me, my grandfather married her anyway.)

I personally don’t care what anyone else’s opinion is of who I ultimately marry.  And the funny thing is, while I know certain members of my family will have a conniption should I marry a black guy – the minute I produce adorable babies – all will be forgotten.  At least on some level.  Although I have news for these fair-weather family members, my cute, adorable mixed race babies may not be available for their fair-weather, extremely conditional love.

Have any of you had this challenge?  If so, how have you handled it?

Here’s another post on dating you might like: The Give And Take of Sex

 







My Devina

My Devina

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Comments (3)

  1. My Devina
    Michelle@MyDevinaFebruary 2, 2011
    I received a reply to this post that in my opinion is racist and ignorant. Therefore I am not posting. I am totally fine with people disagreeing with me. But I am not OK with propagating ignorance and hate. We are all one – there is no “us” and “them.” Science shows through DNA testing that we all came from one family. The changes in our appearance, the things that define us as a “race” are due to thousands and thousands of years of living in various places on the earth, and our bodies adapting to those climates and areas. Science also shows that we are literally ALL one. We are all interconnected. Some refer to the web of energy that connects everyone and everything on this planet as the “ether,” others as “zero point energy” and still others as “God source.” Whatever the name – there is only one people on this planet. To hate someone or feel distaste for someone, based on the color of their skin, is to in reality, to hate on yourself.
  2. ChelseaTalksFebruary 5, 2011
    Yes, it is unfortunate, but as a Black woman with bi-racial children I know this issue won’t go away any time soon. The best we can do is explain to our kids why ppl think the way they do & why we disagree. I let those who disagree that it’s not open for discussion & any mistreatment will end with “no access” to my kids. Most ppl come around or go away. Win-win for all.
    • My Devina
      Michelle@MyDevinaFebruary 5, 2011
      Thank you Chelsea. I love your approach.

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