The Coffee Date Without The Coffee:
Online Dating
From the dating archives..
Or as someone pointed out – How my date mistakenly decided I was a dog -and took me for a walk and a trip to Petco instead of having an actual date!
Most of you know- I HATE the coffee date. It’s lame. Its what a guy does when he doesn’t trust his instincts enough, or he’s just, well, lame. (I’ve only had one good coffee date, so I suppose there are exceptions, but overall it screams I CAN’T EVEN COMMIT TO A DINNER DATE.) So, against my better judgement I agree to meet this guy for coffee.
It’s freezing outside. And I rush into the Barnes & Noble near my house (because well, it’s the only place open after 9pm.) My date is not waiting at the door for me. Oh, no. That would be too plebeian. He tells me, I need to come and find him. It’s a “test” to see how well I was paying attention to his profile.
Um – just a little tip – us girls go through 8 or more profiles a day when doing the eHarmony thing. We don’t remember what people write. And besides, half of it is a lie anyway. So really I don’t pay much attention.
I go to the magazine section – no luck. I go to the middle of the book store, thinking I will just look for a guy, in a suit, who looks like a successful attorney, mid 40’s who appears to be waiting for someone – no luck. I’m about to give up when I find him in the travel section.
So I say hello and he says, well let’s get out of here and go for a walk. A walk – it’s 30 degrees outside! It’s 8:45 pm and this dude wants to walk. For some unknown reason, I agree. -We walk aimlessly for a few minutes. He says “Well we could go in there (pointing toward the restaurant I normally meet guys at) but they would want us to order a drink or something if we sat down.”
Wow. Successful, 40 something attorney doesn’t want to actually pay for a drink. Got it.
So I say I’m kind of cold – as we walk past (again) the book store, thinking maybe we could go in and get a flipping coffee. No —- we then go to the Pet Store – and look at the fish. Not the puppies or the kittens, but the fish. And he wants us to pretend that we are a married couple arguing over how big of a tank we should get. Really? – I gave up my night for this? Wow
So luckily the store closes at 9pm But he doesn’t want to leave. The employees come looking for us – twice. Tell us kindly the store closed at 9. He still doesn’t want to leave, actually starts debating with them about if they really need to leave. They finally turn the lights off! And as we are walking out the door the employees are all lined up waiting for us to leave so they can leave.
He did then have to buy me a coffee, because there was nowhere else to go. But when I text him to say I didn’t see this going anywhere, he, being an attorney, tried to argue the point. He actually asked at what point in the night he had lost me….
So here’s the lesson. Always have an exit strategy. Even if it is your girlfriend calling you. Always have a way out. This is the one part of online dating I really suck at – the exit strategy….
What do you think? No or yes on “coffee dates?” Would love for you to join the discussion below : )
Did you like this post? If so, you might also likes these: eHarmony Deconstructed,I’m missing NCIS for This? Always Have an Exit Strategy
Comments (10)
I wonder if you would be so adamant about dinner if it was YOU who had to pony up 60 bucks every time.
Sure you don’t have to go to dinner on a first date. The coffee thing is a little stretch, as is the searching through the entire book store, and then having your date walk to a pet store when it is freezing outside.
If one is worried about spending money every time on meaningless dates perhaps they should change their approach to women.