My Devina

My Devina

Lubrication 101 – The Basics

Lubrication 101 – The Basics

Lubrication is something most people don’t talk about. I’m not sure if it’s because it’s a great unknown, or if, kind of like vibrators, some people think using them equals a bad sex life.

Well…. here’s another way to look at it: just because a woman uses lubricant does NOT mean her partner isn’t doing a great job of turning her on!  While this is of course a possibility, women’s bodies are complex. If we are stressed out, or dehydrated we will not be as naturally lubricated as we like.  Also, given hormonal changes caused by monthly cycles or due to life changes, like pregnancy or menopause, we may also need lubrication. Surprisingly, being on The Pill can also reduce natural lubrication, because The Pill reduces testosterone in women. I know this is the case for me.  And of course, with condoms and just the basic movement of sex, sometimes increased friction is occurring during sex, which can lead to discomfort, easily remedied with a little help from lubrication.

So guys, don’t get all freaked out if your woman wants some lube! This isn’t a reflection of your lover qualities!  It’s just allowing science to help where nature has left off.

To paraphrase my friend Art Noble on in his radio show

“Guys you wouldn’t drive a car without making sure it has oil in it – so why would you try to have sex with a woman, without checking to make sure she is lubricated?”

In my opinion, store bought lubricant can be very helpful during sex, or during self play.  And can at the same time be very frustrating, because various reactions can occur and everyone has their preferences.  And then to make things more complicated, there are water-based and silicone choices available as well. So what’s a girl to do?

While I am by no means a sex-store expert, there are five different kinds of store-bought lubricants that I know of. Water based, silicone, natural oil, lubricant made specifically for male masturbation and anal lubrication. I’m going to talk primarily about the first three types (water, silicone and oils you can get at your health food store).

Here’s the basic overview of water vs silicone:

Water based lubricants are a must-have when using toys, because most toys will become tacky and/or have a permanent film develop on them if you use silicone lubricants with them.

Silicone is a better lubricant if you need something which helps cut down on friction. (For example, if you are small and your partner is big, water-based silicone might not work as well for you, because it’s too thin.)  Silicone is also recommended for water play, as it will not wash away as easily.

The basics on other types of lubricants:

There are also lubricants made for men to use during masturbation, but I’m not a guy, so I won’t go into those. However, I will note that women want to be careful to not use these in a pinch, because some of them contain petroleum based material (which is basically gasoline) and is NOT ever a good idea for inside a woman.  At a minimum you will end up with a yeast infection, although the warning labels indicate that cervical cancer can occur from use of these petroleum products inside a woman.

If you are at home and run out of your favorite lubrication – do NOT grab the vaseline or most baby diaper products – which might seem like a great idea given their viscosity.  These products contain Petrolatum  which is another word for Petroleum.  And again – we don’t want gasoline on our girlie parts – ever!  You can grab olive oil, or my favorite, coconut oil.  But as with all things, allergic reactions are possible.  And natural oils can leave stains more than other lubricants. I talked to my doctor before using, and I’d suggest you do the same if you have any questions or concerns about using something not specifically manufactured for sex. (More on coconut oil in a later post).

My Preference:

So what are my favorites?  At the moment I like two different brands:  Kama Sutra and System Jo. The reason I have multiple products, is that I feel that using the same product every day, leads to irritation.  In Lubrication 102 Part 1 LINK I give a review of my favorite Kama Sutra lubricants.  In my follow-up blog, Lubrication 102 Continued will talk about a few of my favorite System Jo products.

Is there anything else you’d like to know about lubrication?  Or a favorite you have?  If so, please let me know.


My Devina

My Devina is a site for women. Someone once described our site as being about "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Orgasm." And we would agree. Our goal is to provide a site of of flirty, sometimes controversial, mostly humorous and informative posts written for everyone to enjoy. So regardless if your relationship status is single, divorced, in a relationship, or It's Complicated, has uplifting and fun content for you.

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