The Give and Take of Sex

Single Life

by My Devina | 5 comments

Getting naked with someone new, is always an interesting thing. Not just because it’s new, but because different people have different dynamics. For example, some guys like to participate jointly and some like to trade off. And I’m not talking 69 – I just mean, some guys want to make it all about me, and then me make it all about them. And then some like to make it all about us.

I kind of prefer all about us – because otherwise I start to feel self conscious and/or a little unbalanced. Unless I know that the guy really enjoys it being all about me (some do). And at the same time, I really do get turned on by my partner being turned on. And if he’s not getting turned on, because he’s so busy turning me on, well it’s tricky.

On the other hand. If we are trading times of emphasis, then I can completely let go, and totally enjoy all of the sensations running through my body and then thoroughly enjoy turning him on, without worrying that I might do something that might hurt him, like bite him, while cumming. So there’s something to be said for not multi-tasking.

But still, while I do like that occasionally to be all about me, and then all about him. I really do like the back and forth of touching, tasting, kissing and pleasing each other at the same time.

Which leads me to wonder – do I tell the guy I’m dating I want less emphasis on me. Or should I count my blessing and learn to just let it be less about him ???

Guess I should have read my own blog, here’s one on communication: The C-Word Communicaiton Inside a Relationship

My Devina

My Devina is a site for women. Someone once described our site as being about "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Orgasm." And we would agree. Our goal is to provide a site of of flirty, sometimes controversial, mostly humorous and informative posts written for everyone to enjoy. So regardless if your relationship status is single, divorced, in a relationship, or It's Complicated, www.MyDevina.com has uplifting and fun content for you.

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Comments (5)

Sheena LaShayJanuary 14, 2011 Log in to Reply

If I were a guy, I think I’d enjoy knowing this. But I’m a woman trying to think like a guy so I wouldn’t know. Still, in my experience, its always best for me to keep the lines of communication open. And perhaps three months from now I’ll want a time that’s all about me and then the next day I’ll want all about us. So why not just keep talking and keeping doing….each other. 🙂
- Michelle@MyDevinaJanuary 17, 2011 Log in to Reply
  
  Thank you Sheena. I agree – I should be able to communicate these things in a fun way. : )
Patrick GriggsMarch 11, 2011 Log in to Reply

Hmmm, very interesting indeed.
AngelicaMarch 20, 2011 Log in to Reply

I love your site and I love that you address some of these sexual issues–not many women often do! I wrote an article about the give and take in relationships as well; it’s a bit of a different take on it. I would NOT tell the guy you are dating you want less interest on you, I would just continue to do what comes naturally when you are hooking up. There are times when I put full attention on my boyfriend and there are times when he does the same. I think the key is to just try make sure you both feel satisfied.
http://whatilrnedfrom.blogspot.com/search/label/Sex
- Michelle@MyDevinaMarch 20, 2011 Log in to Reply
  
  Thanks A. : ) I commented on your blog post as well. : ) I actually agreed with your comment. In the end I didn’t tell that guy less focus on me, I just learned to enjoy that flow.

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