My Devina

Dating After 30: The Misdirected Pursuit of Happiness

I was talking to a guy friend about some of what I had observed while dating. We were talking about men in their 40’s / 50’s who are successful, yet out partying, playing volleyball or other sports daily, traveling the world constantly and dating 20 year old girls who don’t care and won’t question.  My friend said something very astute.  That their behavior was a misdirected pursuit of happiness.  They think that certain things which made them feel good while doing them, will make them happy. But happiness and feeling temporarily good are two different things.

And so these guys, they keep self medicating – with girls, with travel, with alcohol, with sports because they are trying to feel “happy.”  But all they feel is “good.” So they keep doing more in an attempt to find happiness.  But happiness is something inside of us – it doesn’t come from things. It comes from being present in our lives. And in being happy inside.

I’m not saying we can’t have great things, and great vacations and awesome fun while drinking.  But if we do those things when we know how to be happy inside – then we are truly happy.  Not just feeling good, and constantly looking for the next feel-good buzz. But sustainably happy.

What do you think? Do you agree or disagree and why? : )

For a funny dating story, see Looking For A Few Good Men

My Devina

My Devina is a site for women. Someone once described our site as being about "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Orgasm." And we would agree. Our goal is to provide a site of of flirty, sometimes controversial, mostly humorous and informative posts written for everyone to enjoy. So regardless if your relationship status is single, divorced, in a relationship, or It's Complicated, www.MyDevina.com has uplifting and fun content for you.